Profile "cleaned up" for SE.

DEVICE:

• Emulates human speech. Fails Turing test.
• Defective autistic firmware burned out mutant super powers. Unit discarded.
• Now in the broken robot dump behind The Corporation, with Astroboy and the kid from AI.

EDUCATION:

• Valedictorian of computer science dept at #3 CS school
• Masters in digital security, 3.8 GPA

PASSIONS:

• Riemannian hypergeometry (hyperbolic)
• Lorentzian hypergeometry (pseudometric)
• Δ9-THC
• Cheap cigarettes

REASON LEFT LAST EMPLOYER:

The suits saw me building a tricorder on work time — even though it had colored blinking lights like Geordie's!

The gamma spectrum told the feds whats in the rusty barrels the Mafia dumped off Jersey. The suits gave me awards for that, for my neutron embrittlement gizmo, and my 3D skyshine stuff.

I walked off the job anyway.

IRL, I have autism (emotional R-word -ation) and AvPD (psychotic shyness). I can't look at people or speak above a whisper. I'm always paralyzed with embarrassment.

My shrink told me to ignore fear like a Vulcan. It's mere illuuuusion, see? She said to "be friendly" with the men grownups.

Beat it, ya 'tardigrade crash 'n burn!
Go back to your desk! You're rejected!

But Luxi don't do Kobayashi Maru.
I exploded the bolts and ejected.

My cozy space pod:

You can drop 240v grid power to 120 if you hack one AC phase wave.

I read a lot in 3 years.

Me in space

CURRENT EMPLOYER:

Two kind, elderly gentlemen saw that pic and rescued me. They own a college boarding house, and they gave me a room and a job: providing academics with all-night professional service.

That's right,

I lay around naked
And sell my patootie
Because knowledge is not power
And truth is not beauty

IT'S WHAT MENTALLY-ILL HOMELESS WOMEN HAVE TO DO. DEAL WITH IT.

It's the only job where you can charge MORE if you're paralyzed with embarrassment, can't talk, and your whole body blushes. Some guys will pay Big Money for that.

This lucrative niche is scary but exciting, no more disgusting than hospital work, and best of all: NOBODY HATES ME!!!

So I lay in bed all day, study astrophysics, talk to you on Stax...

and light joints with Force Lightning from my middle finger.

My religion.

Stax censored the link, but scroll to About Me at my hypergeometry site.