I met
Jessica Tarlov in 2019, when I joined BDG. Before long, I had assumed two very important roles.
The first was President of the Jessie Tarlov Fan Club; a responsibility I took very seriously then and continue to carry proudly today.
The second was representing the incredible proprietary research she produced each year, giving our clients a window into the GenZennial mindset, and a smarter way to reach them.
I vividly remember a trip to Dallas to present that research. As we were leaving a café, a woman stopped Jessie.
“ARE YOU JESSIE TARLOV?”
Jessie confirmed that, yes, indeed she was.
“Well, I certainly don’t agree with your politics, but I love YOU.”
I’ve thought about that moment many times, and even more recently as I’ve listened to Jessie describe the motivation behind her latest book, I Disagree. It is impeccable, deeply useful and one you should order today.
I have always thought of Jessie as unflappable, even in the most adversarial conditions. Listening to her in conversation with Henry Winkler this morning, her clarity was at an all-time high. She reminded us of the social science beneath disagreement; the unique self-defense triggers that propel our reactions, our words and our fear.
My favorite passage in the book may be the final one (it was very hard to choose)
“So yes, rage when you need to. Fight for what you believe in. Use your voice. Show up prepared with facts and conviction. But don’t forget that the person across from you-whether across the Thanksgiving table or across the cable news split screen-is a person. Flawed, complicated, sometimes infuriating, but still human. That’s not weakness. That’s strength. And it’s the only way forward.”
And because Jessie understands both disagreement and timing, she closes with a true gift: tips for surviving the holiday table. So you can focus on passing the turkey, not judgment.
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