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As a professional software developer, I'm curious as to which operating system the Programmer of the Universe used to run make heavens and make earth.

I found a reference to “the Windows in the skies opened” (Genesis 7:11), which at first glance seems to be an endorsement of Microsoft. However, the remainder of the chapter indicates that this forced a server reboot, and thus should not be taken as a recommendation.

So perhaps He used MacOS instead. Evidence for this includes the installation of the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil (Genesis 2:17, 3), a premium-branded fruit. (The text doesn't state the specific type, but artists have traditionally portrayed it as an Apple.) The terms of service for the Torah include “Don’t add anything to the word...and don’t take anything away from it” (Deuteronomy 4:2), which is very reminiscent of Apple's closed ecosystem.

However, the command “Be fruitful and multiply” (Genesis 1:28) seems to endorse Linux, famous for its proliferation of distributions and forks.

I've also seen many articles by Rabbis endorse BSD. Why? Is it somehow more holy than other Unix variants?


This question is Purim Torah and is not intended to be taken completely seriously. See the Purim Torah policy.

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  • Very similar: judaism.stackexchange.com/questions/89670/… Commented 2 days ago
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    Windows, because He's mining all our information and personalizing our experiences based on it. Commented 2 days ago
  • 1
    Either that or TempleOS Commented 2 days ago
  • דא��ס איז די אָפּערירן סיסטעם Commented 2 days ago
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    Not a Jew at any rate, but I skim PTIJ because of questions like this one Commented yesterday

5 Answers 5

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It is Windows for the win!

As it says in Shir HaShirim 2:9:

הִנֵּה־זֶ֤ה עוֹמֵד֙ אַחַ֣ר כׇּתְלֵ֔נוּ מַשְׁגִּ֙יחַ֙ מִן־הַֽחַלֹּנ֔וֹת

There he stands behind our (fire)wall, gazing through the Windows (operating system)

Sadly, the operating system Mac-OS just doesn't perform for G-d. As it says expressly in Yeshaya 3:24:

וְהָיָה֩ תַ֨חַת בֹּ֜שֶׂם מַ֣ק יִֽהְיֶ֗ה וְתַ֨חַת חֲגוֹרָ֤ה נִקְפָּה֙ וְתַ֨חַת מַעֲשֶׂ֤ה מִקְשֶׁה֙ קָרְחָ֔ה וְתַ֥חַת פְּתִיגִ֖יל מַחֲגֹ֣רֶת שָׂ֑ק כִּי־תַ֖חַת יֹֽפִי׃

And then — Instead of perfume, there shall be (the use of) Mac; And instead of an apron, a rope; Instead of a diadem of beaten-work, A shorn head; Instead of a rich robe, A girding of sackcloth; A burn instead of beauty.

In other words, whilst it might have the allure of something special, when it comes down to it, it is horrible!

And when it comes to using the internet, Chrome is definitely avoided. Like it says in Mishnah Chullin 3:1:

נִקַּב קרום שֶׁל מֹחַ

Chrome causes a hole in the brain

Meaning, the hours of batlanus that it causes leads people to operate in a completely mindless state.

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    It seems the Chrome verse must also address Tehilim 12:9 as more precise. Commented 2 days ago
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    Love it! @YDJ (15 char) Commented 2 days ago
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In Esther, he uses eunuchs. -30-

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It seems historically to have been MacOS, up until the Exodus. G-d used Macos (specifically, MacOS 10) in His campaign against the Egyptians, but G-d promised the Jews after the Red Sea that, henceforth, all the Macos that he previously used against Egypt will be sunsetted - כׇּֽל־הַמַּחֲלָ֞ה אֲשֶׁר־שַׂ֤מְתִּי בְמִצְרַ֙יִם֙ לֹא־אָשִׂ֣ים עָלֶ֔יךָ.

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The answer is actually surprising. It says in Exodus 17:1:

ויסעו כל־עדת בני־ישראל ממדבר־סין למסעיהם על־פי יהוה ויחנו ברפידים ואין מים לשתת העם

From the wilderness of Sin the whole Israelite community continued as was God's Pi. They encamped at Rephidim, but there was no water to drink.

From here we can see that God originally used Raspberry Pi from the Exodus, but after the complaining of the Israelites a reboot was needed. And then he switched to MacOS, as shown:

וַהֲרֵמֹתָ֨ מכס לַֽיהֹוָ֗ה מֵאֵ֞ת אַנְשֵׁ֤י הַמִּלְחָמָה֙ הַיֹּצְאִ֣ים לַצָּבָ֔א אֶחָ֣ד נֶ֔פֶשׁ מֵחֲמֵ֖שׁ הַמֵּא֑וֹת מִן־הָאָדָם֙ וּמִן־הַבָּקָ֔ר וּמִן־הַחֲמֹרִ֖ים וּמִן־הַצֹּֽאן׃

You shall exact a MacOS for GOD: in the case of the warriors who engaged in the campaign, one item in five hundred, of persons, oxen, donkeys, and sheep,

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Obviously, God used the venerable DOS to create the world -- much superior, in the mind of real programmers, to later bastardizations. Dati -- the way to go!


DOS (דּוֹס) — a Hebrew word used to describe an ultra-Orthodox Jew, mainly one whose external expression or behavior characterizes a very conservative religious lifestyle. דוס (דּוֹס) — מילה סלנגית בעברית, מקובלת בתקשורת יומיומית ובקרב דוברי עברית — משמשת לתיאור יהודי חרדי, בעיקר בעל ביטוי חיצוני או התנהגות המאפיינים אורח חיים דתי-שמרני מאוד. פירוש המילה ורמזיה השכיחים

In Israel, Haredi Jews are sometimes also called dos (plural dosim), that mimics the traditional Ashkenazi Hebrew pronunciation of the Hebrew word datiyim (religious)

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  • If you want to go with this option, it would be better if you said that Hashem created the world with faith, which is דת - dos Commented 2 days ago
  • Good point, although אֱמוּנָה is more commonly used for faith. Commented 2 days ago
  • you were sorta מכוון to my comment on the question above :-) also see yi.wikipedia.org/wiki/MS-DOS Commented 2 days ago
  • The source Esther 3:8 Commented 2 days ago

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